My question for you is, are you living your authentic self, the real you? The majority of us are not. We wear different labels, and we have been conditioned to behave differently at various times or events in our lives. Society puts a stamp on what is classed as successful and acceptable. A lot of us suppress the desire of showing who we indeed are. I met people who stuck in jobs and occupations for decades because they felt that was a real job and that is what they have to do to survive in this world. See, we get conditioned, the world is telling us how to survive, and hardly anyone is questioning the things we do on a day to day basis. Suppressing our authentic-self can lead to depression, anxiety, frustration, anger and so much more.
How can I live my authentic-self?
In diving deep and do some soul-searching! There are some questions you can ask yourself. These questions will help you to identify if you are living your authentic self.
Do you like your job?
I cannot highlight this strongly enough; so many people who have so many incredible talents but end up in a so-called “real job”. I have seen fantastic artists who end up being a builder because they have been told that this is a proper job and being an artist is something you do as a hobby. That is only one example. So my question is, how did you choose your career? Did you maybe study something you thought you would like and be successful in, just to find out it is not YOU but you kept going because it costs money or because your parents spent a lot of money to pay for this? We feel scared, or our commitment gets questioned when we are dropping out of something.
Somehow someone created this belief that work is supposed to be NOT fun. Think about it! We are more productive when we do something that we love and something where we can use our gifts and talents.
Are you happy with your relationship status?
School, University, career, finding a partner, get a house, get married and have children. This is a timeline a lot of people have either consciously or unconsciously in their mind. It is almost a program.
Maybe you are single, and people ask you regularly when you will settle down and find a partner and have children. Or others maybe have a partner, and they get nagged continuously by friends and family when they finally get married. Society still has these structures. It is almost when you are not married or have children at a certain age; people think something MUST be wrong with you. How many people do you know stuck in a relationship because of the children? They do not want to get divorced or split up because of them. Or how many people settle with a partner because the clock seems to tick and they need to have children now?
We compromise our needs and our authentic self to satisfy society’s norm because we might be afraid to stand out or be outside of what the statistic sets as normal.
Are you trying to behave appropriately for your age?
Here another thing. A very sick belief system society created. Behaving appropriately for your age. How dare you wearing vibrant clothes or go for a stylish haircut in your 50’s, 60’s or 70’s. People might ask you if you hit a midlife crisis when you suddenly start to dress more stylish, maybe you went and got a tattoo or for us women; you might start going for a shocking pink lipstick. Do you feel your dress differently because of your age and what people would think about you? Please have a look at this. I know the times have changed slightly. You do not need to start to wear orthopedic shoes and grey or beige clothes and stop wearing makeup because you hit a certain age.
How to start living your authentic self?
Question why you are doing the things you do, especially when you feel they make you unhappy! Understand that we sometimes trade in who we indeed are so we feel we fit into society. Society is changing, and you would be surprised when you are doing the things you want to do in your life, that more and more people come forward and tell you that they admire you for this. You spread hope. In being your authentic self you are happier, will more likely live longer and help so many more people around you. You start to attract the people in your life who supposed to be there.