Did people tell you in the past that you are too kind or too nice? Do people tell you that your kindness is actually your weakness and you think: What the hell is going on in this world? It is not very uncommon that people hear this. Kindness is your superpower because you hit people right in the heart with it and when you hit people right in the heart they are vulnerable and feel that you can see through them. Here are some reasons why people evaluate your kindness as a weakness or are scared of it.
Treat them mean to keep them keen
I cannot tell you how often I heard this phrase. Somehow some people believe they are more attractive when you are mean or when you do not show that you like someone. You find this very often when people are dating or show interest in a person as a potential partner. It is also used in organizations. If you are not kind to people, you will feed into their belief that they need to prove that they are worthy of your attention or being with you. It feeds into a very animalistic behavior which is chasing after something and yearning for something you cannot get easily. A very sick and sad approach.
If people are kind, they want something from me
Yep, that is another one of these sad beliefs around kindness. Some people believe that you have a different agenda, you must be kind for a reason because you want something from them. People can get paranoid when you are kind to them because maybe they have such a low opinion of themselves and do not believe that they are worth being treated kindly.
You are a pushover or walkover
Well, another misconception. Kindness does not mean that people have no boundaries. Greeting someone, opening the door for someone or asking how they are are not indicators that you give everything to people without setting boundaries. Kind people are actually very mindful, and kindness is a mindfulness practice.
What are the benefits of kindness?
Yes, there are benefits of being kind, and I do not mean being artificially kind, I mean being genuinely kind. Kind people very likely know how it is not to be treated kindly.
Here are some of the benefits kindness has:
Kindness is part of being grateful
Oh, kindness is very strongly connected to gratitude and gratitude is actually a very underestimated tool in mental health. Kindness makes us appreciate the people around us, and we take a moment out of our day to show kindness to people. People who are kind make an effort to be part of someone’s life. Which means you live a deeper and richer life. You make far more connections and friendships in life.
It makes you more attractive
Even though the Treat-Them-Mean-To-Keep-Them-Keen-Approach might work to create physical attraction, kindness will last a lot longer. In the world, we live in there seems to be hardly anyone who is listening to us or acknowledging us. A kind person creates a far more in-depth connection. You see people as a whole being, and you are interested in people. Kind people are more likely to dive far deeper. Physical attraction does not last long, therefore, kind people create deeper relationships because they do care about you as a person.
They are not part of the drama
Kind people are less likely to create or being part of any drama. The misconception is that they are weak, but they will not be part of gossip, drama, or shaming people. Kindness understands that we all go through hard times, everyone has their flaws. Kind people seem to be more understanding because very likely they know how it feels to be judged.
Kindness is a superpower; a kind person is not a walkover or pushover, a kind person has the guts to be kind in a world that can be miserable. They are limited edition, and with this, they are not just a face in the crowd they stand out.