Broken Heart: How To Heal After a Relationship Breakup

Broken Heart: How To Heal After a Relationship Breakup

How to heal a broken heart after a relationship breakup?

It can cost you a lot of tears, tons of ice-cream or chocolate and sleepless nights. It is almost inevitable not to get our hearts broken during our life here on earth. In some cases, it can hurt like hell, but somehow we survived and carried on. You might ask yourself in the midst of it, what has gone wrong? Can you win your ex-partner back? People sometimes entirely blame themselves. Here is a small guideline for healing your broken heart.

Give yourself time!

Cry, eat tons of ice-cream. Talk to your friends. You are in the midst of a grieving process and to understand that a relationship is over will take time.

Avoid posting it all over Social Media!

I am a big fan of Social Media, however, posting it all over Social Media maybe even attacking your ex-partner is a big NO, NO. Avoid it, delete your Ex from all of your Social Media platforms. Don’t stalk your Ex on there too, it only opens up the wounds, and you delay any healing process.

Being loved for who you are!

Okay here is the thing, when someone breaks up with us we somehow think we are not worthy of their love. We want to change, want to tell them that we can give them everything they desire. BUT, and this is a huge thing I have learned this down the line too, you should be loved for who you are! If you were not downright nasty or horrible to your partner and you think they left you for a better-looking version of you wave them goodbye, you do not need someone like this in your life. You genuinely deserve someone who loves you for who you are!

You will go through all the stages of grieving.

The fantastic Elizabeth Kuebler-Ross has observed them beautifully, Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. You might bounce between all of them. You are indeed grieving even though your Ex is not dead.

Rebound is not the answer!

Heal your heart first, do not listen to any friends who advise you finding someone quickly to get over your broken heart. You need time to heal and understand, and it is not fair to the other person. If it is a Rebounce you will compare them with your ex, you are not open to a new relationship.

Know who your real friends are!

With a breakup comes very often also a new circle of friends. Some of them stay some of them go, especially if you and your ex-partner had the same circle of friends. It will quickly show who is there for you and who is not, go out and find a hobby or interest you might have neglected. Another advice from me is to avoid the so-called “friends” who keep you updated on every move your ex-partner makes. Or worst when they admit, that they might have known that your Ex-Partner cheated on you. Get rid of these so-called friends they are toxic for your personal growth and they will also delay the healing of your broken heart.

Acknowledge NOT only the good times!

Yes, especially when we want our ex-partner back. We might see our ex-partner through rose-tinted glasses. You might start crying and noticing all of the things you have planned for the future and all the good memories you have had together. But there are also annoying things, be glad you do not have them in your life anymore.

Find yourself!

Who are you? Did you compromise your authentic self for being in this relationship? Very often people fall into the trap, that if they change into the person, the ex-partner wants they will be happy. But what happens instead is that we trade in our true authentic self and portrait someone we believe is attractive to the person we desire. We attach our self-worth to the love of a particular person. Never trade your true-self into something you think someone else wants. It is fake and only ends up in tears. Be yourself, and you will attract a person in your life who loves you for who you are. At the end this is what we all want, being loved for who we truly are.

Be gentle with yourself. I wish you a Strong Heart. <3

About the author

Jennifer White Ad. Dip. Psych. is a global human potential thought leader, blogger, Psychological Therapist with CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) skills, Life Coach and Public and Motivational Speaker. Jennifer White has experience in counselling and coaching people with substance misuse, anxiety and depression. She is currently working as a self-employed Psychological Therapist and Life Coach in her practice, helping people reaching their real potential. She holds public and motivational speeches and shared her ideas with other speakers on the stage of the Celebrate Your Life event in Arizona 2016. She runs successfully her self-development and self-help groups on- and offline.

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