Embracing change can be difficult especially if something changed we loved or felt secure with. Maybe you felt that your life went really well, and bam something unexpected happens, and it changes everything. It might be the loss of a job, loved one, relationship breakups or maybe even your health. Sometimes things hit us out of the blue.
How do you embrace change when the shit hits the fan?
It is normal that you feel scared
When you did not see it coming it is normal that you feel afraid. You might ask yourself: Why me? You are feeling anxious because of the unknown that lies ahead of you. Will you be able to cope? Will you be happy again? Your routine is changing, and routines are the ones that keep us feeling secure. Understand that we all went through changes in our lives. Some of them might have been small, but there are massive changes that we survived and some of them we even embraced. Try not to hide that you are scared. Talk about it with your friends and loved ones. Start journaling and reflecting.
It is not only happening to you
Sometimes we believe that unexpected or unpleasant things are happening just to us. Fact is that we all will go through tough times. Embracing change can be difficult but understand that in our lifetime we will get disappointed, lose people, money jobs, will have health issues. The beautiful thing is that we have these days the internet, we can connect with a lot more people, and there are online support groups out there too. Reach out get as much support as you can.
Changes can be a blessing
Yes, sometimes changes are a blessing in disguise. As unpleasant as some things are, changes are forcing us to adjust and look at our lives again. Changes help us grow. In tough times it also shows us who is there for us. Maybe the job you lost was not really you, and you are now forced to look for something else. Health issues show us to implement a healthier lifestyle. Remember there were times where you thought this change is terrible only to find out that it was leading you to something better.
Sometimes we believe that we cannot cope. We may have lost confidence in our coping or problem-solving skills. Maybe we even ask ourselves: Why do I deserve this? A sudden change can knock our self-esteem because we take it personally. It is absolutely normal that you feel less confident, but your confidence will return. Our confidence is always attached to the routines we have and our skills; when your routine is broken, it takes a while to get another routine back. Your spirit will rise again, be patient get help and ask for support.
Put yourself back into the driver’s seat
Of course, after the first shock, we might want to resist change. We are upset, scared, angry or depressed. Maybe we even wish that our life before the change will be handed back to us. Trying to avoid change will prolong our suffering. Instead of seeing just what you have lost, look at what you can do to implement the change and another routine in your life. How can you embrace this change, what is positive in the change that happened suddenly to you? It could even be the appreciation and gratitude of things you have. Put yourself into the driver’s seat and put a list of things down you can do to make this work. You would be surprised how much you actually can do. Of course, a mourning process is natural, by all means, you are allowed to mourn. Mourning is a process that helps us embracing change.
There is a saying out there: “The only constant in life is change.” Some changes are more pleasant than others. You are not alone, we all go through this. Believe that whatever you are presented with that there are people who can support you and that you so far survived 100% of your worst days. I wish that you are embracing change and that you come out of it stronger than before.