We all had them, difficult times. Life’s adversity can be hard on us. Maybe you go through a loss of a loved one, or you got fired at a job or your partner broke up with you. Some of us might even go through financial difficulties, and we find ourselves awake at night thinking about how we can manage it all.
Here is a list of things you can do to survive difficult times:
Do not ask why. Ask how!
You might be one of the people who ask themselves WHY?
Maybe you ask yourself: Why did it happen to me? Why is life always hard? Why is my life not easier?
Even though it is understandable, but asking in this way will only get you stuck. Your mind very likely will come up with a lot reasons, some of them can be actually true, but very often I noticed people would find reasons that are far away from the reality and have no validity.
Instead of asking WHY ask HOW or WHO!
- How can you be happy again?
- How can I earn more money or sort out my financial crisis?
- Who can I ask for help?
- Who went through a similar situation and how did they solve their problems?
Our brain then will concentrate on a solution and not a reason. If you are purely focused on the reason, you are more likely to end up in victim mode without any solution. Trust me; it is a miserable place to be.
Surround yourself with positive people.
Your inner circle and friends are so important, especially in hard times. Make sure you surround yourself with doers, people who see the positive in things and situations. People who are solution-focused and not moaners. If you have no one like that in your inner circle make an effort to find those people in your life.
Go out, join clubs, look for positive groups online. When we look for positive and nurturing people, it will also bring hope back into our lives.
Stop complaining, forgive, learn out of it and move on.
This especially applies when you got cheated on or betrayed. It sounds harsh, but every single one of us will experience unfairness in our lives. There is no exemption. This alone might already help you. It is, of course, natural that we complain, but if complaining is part of your everyday life, you will very likely feel depressed, angry or anxious. You handed your happiness over to a situation that happened in the past and let it define your present and future. Whatever happened in the past do not let the person who did you wrong have power over your future.
Give yourself time to heal.
Understand that time plays a vital role. Be gentle with yourself. Do not suppress your emotions. Feel them, don’t get lost in them, but listen to what they have to say. I met so many people that believed that they have to get over the death of a loved one within 6 weeks. Grieving is a process. Grieving comes in waves.
Sit in Silence.
I really love meditation or switching the TV, radio, and computer off. Pull yourself a cup of tea, or take a walk through the woodlands. We need to experience stillness. With the technology these days our brain gets bombarded with so much information that our mind sometimes has difficulties to keep up. Stillness and silence are things we almost have forgotten.
Silence helps you to defragment your thoughts and lets you breathe. The solution to our problems lies within us. We only have forgotten to listen to our inner voice which we only really can hear when we sit in silence.
Difficult times are not pleasant however they help you grow.